When people feel pushed into a corner, they push back. If a customer senses you are defensive, rude, or unhelpful, it is natural for them to push back. They push back with their words, tone, or by asking to talk to a supervisor.
In a live De-escalation workshop recently, I had my audience divide up into pairs. And I had them identify as partner “A” or partner “B.”
Then I said,“Partner A, hold the palm of your hand up. And then I want you to place your palm next to Partner B’s palm.”
I then told Partner A to press against the palm of person B. After a couple of seconds, I asked, “How many of you who had the role of Partner B pushed against the palm of person A?”
About 75% of the hands when up. Which was interesting. I didn’t tell Partner B to press or push. I told Partner A, to press, but I gave no instructions of pressing or pushing to partner B.
So, I asked those with their hands up, “Why did you push against the palm of the other person?” They said things like, “They were pushing, so I pushed back.”
Pushing back, when someone pushes against you is what most of us do, including your customers.
When people feel pushed into a corner, they push back. If a customer senses you are defensive, rude, or unhelpful, it is natural for them to push back. They push back with their words, tone, or by asking to talk to a supervisor.
Minimize escalation in aggression or an escalation to a supervisor by not allowing yourself to push because pushing will almost always result in your customer pushing back.
I describe the Don’t Push idea in this short video. Use this video to teach your employees not to push.
We tend to push in these ways:
Arguing
Telling a customer they are wrong
An unwilling or unhelpful attitude
Saying something like, “There’s nothing I can do for you.”
Make sure you don’t intentionally push a customer, because if you do, they’ll push back, and this makes things much harder for both of you.
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